Now, listen, I don’t… because, folks, have you heard, I don’t know if you’d, maybe you hadn’t heard this one. But people are saying, good people, saying he’s building a robot. You know, like King Kong, a real… it’s yuuge, folks, really big. And it’s coming out of your tax dollars. Now I don’t know if… because when I was telling Valerie about this, because it’s really gotten to the point, you know, you walk down the street and they’ve got his face just posted up everywhere, Obama’s… sad. Very sad, folks, and it’s just the beginning, won’t be long before they’re breaking out the prayer mats in elementary schools, folks, and I could have told you that fifteen years ago, that we’d get to this point, and now they have this giant robot… well, maybe we’ll have to get one for me, right folks? Only we’ll make it run on coal, folks, clean burning coal, get some good hardworking Americans to keep their jobs, and we can have it up at the border - boy, that’ll keep them back in their country, folks, and they can keep lying and stealing and raping over there, keep it outta the States. I said we should get a giant robot, I told John Kelly - crooked John Kelly, he’s just no good, and Hilary and Obama and they’re just, they’re out to get me and you gotta put a stop to it.
I had a really neat idea about playing a changeling bladesinger who most likely pretended to be elven to learn the art, although I did have a not-quite-RAW idea about the old switched-at-birth changeling myth, where his elven “parents” would have taught him before he slipped up and they realized what he was.
He was actually three characters in one: a mostly nondescript human “bard”, spinning extremely tall tales about a mysterious elven bladesinger who doled out vigilante justice at night (also the changeling), and the changeling himself, who hated the way people looked at his true form, would only have revealed it to the party if he had no other choice, and really just wanted to be a hero in a group of adventurers, doing the kind of stuff he made up and sang about in taverns.
I came up with this concept a few years ago, but even before COVID I was kind of my group’s forever DM, so even if I ended up at a gaming table again soon I probably wouldn’t get to play it, so if you like it, feel free to use it. You cannot steal what is gifted!