Every case of a random person hiring a “hitman” that I have heard of has, in fact, been someone hiring an undercover cop. And the people soliciting the services went to jail for a good long while.

There’s a big cake mix manufacturing plant near where I grew up, and I knew a lot of people who worked there. They all confirmed that the only difference between the name brand cake mix and the store brand they made was the box they put it into at the end of the process.

A lot of my favorites have already been mentioned, but I don’t see “Caper” yet.

“Thanks for stopping by; thanks for breaking my cow lamp,” is still common parlance in our household.

And “The Cheat Is Not Dead” is a classic Strongbad hit.