Try other areas of her body (e.g. neck, ear, nipple), try full body massage beforehand, her mental state as well as yours will definitely play a role, and there are certain rhythms and grip techniques if penetration is the only positive sensation for her. Also maybe she would be more turned on by switching roles more where you were on the receiving end. Have fun, good luck!
I hadn’t considered the other response you got but it is very true! What I was referring to is your hand grip inside. Typically there is a bulb. If you are on top of her (prone) with two fingers inside, do a spiderman web shoot grip and see if you can feel it. Find it and grip it and work your arm like you want to rip it out of her. Definitely start gentle at first but IME the rough stuff will be well tolerated and enjoyable. Oh yea, set a towel down under her and probably a hand towel at the ready 😉